Support the Monkey! Tell All your Friends and Teachers |
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5 [Takes plate from below.] Have some bread and butter.The bread and butter is for Gwendolen. Gwendolen is devoted to bread and butter. JACK [Advancing to table and helping himself.] And very good bread and butter it is too. ALG Well, my dear fellow, you need not eat as if you were going to eat it all. You behave as if you were married to her already. You are not married to her already, and I don’t think you ever will be. JACK Why, on earth do you say that? ALG Well, in the first place girls never marry the men they flirt with. Girls don’t think it right. JACK Oh, that is nonsense! ALG It isn’t. It is a great truth. It accounts for the extraordinary number of bachelors that one sees all over the place. In the second place, I don’t give my consent. JACK Your consent! ALG My dear fellow, Gwendolen is my first cousin. And before I allow you to marry her, you will have to clear up the whole question of Cecily. [Rings bell.] JACK Cecily! What on earth do you mean? What do you mean, Algy, by Cecily? I don’t know anyone of the name of Cecily. [Enter Lane.] ALG Bring me that cigarette case Mr. Worthing left in the smokingroom the last time he dined here. LANE Yes, sir. [Lane goes out.] JACK Do you mean to say you have had my cigarette case all this time? I wish to goodness you had let me know. I have been writing frantic letters to Scotland Yard about it. I was very nearly offering a large reward. ALG Well, I wish you would offer one. I happen to be more than usually hard up. |